Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are.
–Malcolm Forbes
Stop lying to yourself. You know how you really feel and what you really want and you can’t hide from it — it will only haunt you and eat at you from the inside. Own up to it and face it and take it in. You can’t become who you’re supposed to be if you can’t embrace who you already are.
Stop lying to others — your friends, your family, your co-workers, your boss, your clients. There is no point. You’re only letting them hold you hostage. Be honest with them. Candy coat nothing. That moment of awkwardness will pass a lot faster than you think and you’ll feel a lot better about afterward — more confident, more self-assured, more at peace.
Stop lying to your lovers. It will only make you resent them. Trust can’t subsist on lies. If there’s something that you feel you have to hide from them, it must be because there’s some part about it that deep down inside you really want. If you can’t reconcile that with your relationship, then you have to make a choice and accept the consequences.
And never choose the lie. You are who you are and you want what you want. There’s no shame in it and there’s hiding from it, so there’s no point in lying to yourself about it.